Thank you 2012 - Hello 2013!

And to me, the dreaming-out-loud yet be-here-now me: 

in your dreams and your present moments, 

know that I would will always be here.

xoxo, G

December 28: Feast of the Holy Innocents

The Massacre of the Innocents
Peter Paul Rubens, ca. 1610-1612
Oil on panel
The Thompson Collection at the Art Gallery of Ontario

Since the sixth century, on December 28, the Church has celebrated the memory of those children killed because of Herod's rage against Christ (cf. Mt 2:16-17). Liturgical tradition refers to them as the "Holy Innocents" and regards them as martyrs. Throughout the centuries Christian art, poetry and popular piety have enfolded the memory of the "tender flock of lambs" with sentiments of tenderness and sympathy. These sentiments are also accompanied by a note of indignation against the violence with which they were taken from their mothers' arms and killed.

In our own times, children suffer innumerable forms of violence which threaten their lives, dignity and right to education. On this day, it is appropriate to recall the vast host of children not yet born who have been killed under the cover of laws permitting abortion, which is an abominable crime. 

As recorded in the gospel of Matthew (below), after the visit of the Magi, Herod, in rage and jealousy, slaughtered all the baby boys in Bethlehem and surrounding countryside in an attempt to destroy his perceived rival, the infant Messiah. These "innocents" are honored by the Church as martyrs.

In countries where our own innocents are daily being slaughtered by abortion, this feast day is a special time to remember the unborn, to pray for their cause, and perhaps to picket or pray at facilities where unborn babies are killed through abortion.

~ Excerpted from www.wf-f.org

December 27: Feast of the Apostle Saint John, the Evangelist

St John the Evangelist
El Greco, 1595-1604
Oil on canvas
Museo del Prado, Madrid

Apostle John the Evangelist [(יוחנן Standard Hebrew Yoḥanan, Tiberian Hebrew Yôḥānān meaning "Yahweh is gracious", Greek: Εὐαγγελιστής Ἰωάννης) (c. AD 1 – c. 100)] is the presumed author of the fourth Gospel and, by tradition, the Apocalypse.

John was the son of Zebedee and Salome, and brother of James the Greater. In the Gospels the two brothers are often called after their father "the sons of Zebedee" and received from Christ the honorable title of Boanerges, i.e. "sons of thunder" (Mark 3:17). Originally they were fishermen and fished with their father in the Lake of Genesareth.

According to the usual and entirely probable explanation they became, however, for a time disciples of John the Baptist, and were called by Christ from the circle of John's followers, together with Peter and Andrew, to become His disciples (John 1:35-42). The first disciples returned with their new Master from the Jordan to Galilee and apparently both John and the others remained for some time with Jesus (cf. John ii, 12, 22; iv, 2, 8, 27 sqq.). Yet after the second return from Judea, John and his companions went back again to their trade of fishing until he and they were called by Christ to definitive discipleship (Matthew 4:18-22; Mark 1:16-20).

In the lists of the Apostles John has the second place (Acts 1:13), the third (Mark 3:17), and the fourth (Matthew 10:3;Luke 6:14), yet always after James with the exception of a few passages (Luke 8:51; 9:28 in the Greek text; Acts 1:13).

Early Christian art usually represents St. John with an eagle, symbolizing the heights to which he rises in the first chapter of his Gospel. The chalice as symbolic of St. John, which, according to some authorities, was not adopted until the thirteenth century, is sometimes interpreted with reference to the Last Supper, again as connected with the legend according to which St. John was handed a cup of poisoned wine, from which, at his blessing, the poison rose in the shape of a serpent. Perhaps the most natural explanation is to be found in the words of Christ to John and James "My chalice indeed you shall drink" (Matthew 20:23).

APLYC8 Theme Song - Many Lives One Mission

An Anthology of Looking - On Talking to Your Heart by Paulo Coelho

Don't give in to your fears.

If you do, you won't be able

   to talk to your heart.

An Anthology of Looking: On Awakening by Anthony de Mello

In order to wake up, 
the one thing you need the most
     is not energy
     or strength
     or youthfulness
     or even great intelligence.


The only thing you need most of all
     is the readiness 
     to learn something new. 

An Anthology of Looking: Train - Parachute

Today I'm celebrating one of the highlights of my life: watching Train live in concert in Jakarta precisely a year ago, with my very best best old friend, Grace Susetyo :). Nope, I was, and am not, following over the hype of their Hey Soul Sister hit. (I kinda smirked when I chatted with of some of the concert-goers: yeah, they're the one who sing Hey Soul Sister right? We got the tickets for only 150,000 rupiah from some ticket tout outside. Me: yeah...Hey Soul Sister-hitters huh? Whattt? 150,000 rupiah??? gahhh! But hey, I bought the tickets in full price alright, that's the least I can do for free-internet-downloaders like me ;;D !!) 

Have you heard their Drops of Jupiter, Meet Virginia, She's on Fire, Calling All Angels, When I Look to the Sky, I'm About to Come Alive, Ordinary (OST Spider-Man 2 by the way)...no no no? Men go get their albums then, don't just stop at that one Sister track!

#4 track in their 2009 album. My lucky number. I was lucky yesterday (a year ago), today (a year ago), but not tomorrow (a year ago). Tomorrow (a year ago) I would decide to take a free fall, so I needed (and still need) a parachute. 

Written by Pat Monahan & Gregg Wattenberg
From the album "Save Me, San Fransisco" (2009)

I wanna take you with me to life with no more yesterdays
We can start again awake and so excited
And change the way we always push
The way we pull

I open up and be your parachute
And I'll never let you down
So open up and be my human angel
And we'll only hit the ground
Running

And when the world gets sharp and tries to cut you down to size
And makes you feel like giving in
Oh, I will stay, I will rain, I will wash the words and pain away
And I will chase away the way we push
The way we pull
You're beautiful

I'll open up and be your parachuteAnd I'll never let you down
So open up and be my human angel
And we'll only hit the ground
Running

And if it feels like we might drop
It will stop
So don't look down
It wouldn't be the same without you
This life is too good to give up on

I'll open up and be your parachute
And I'll never let you down
So open up and be my human angel
And we'll only hit the ground
And we're gonna hit the ground
Running

An Anthology of Looking: Israel Kamakawiwoʻole - Somewhere Over the Rainbow

I'm reminiscing this time of the year precisely a year ago. I spent a bloody good Sunday in Jakarta with a person that I came to really care about, but alas the feeling went unrequited. 

More about that tomorrow; in the mean time I believe you would enjoy this song. This is a genius interpretation of that famous Somewhere Over the Rainbow...I don't think anyone else could've done better. I wish I could get a  hold of more of his music (Iz has 8 albums, 4 of which were released posthumously after his death on 1997 -- more about Iz here), but that is for another posting perhaps. 

Music by Harold Arlen

Lyrics by E.Y. Harburg

Original artist: Judy Garland for the 1939 movie "The Wizard of Oz"

Interpretation by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole, featured in the album "Facing Future" (1993)

Somewhere over the rainbow

Way up high

And the dreams that you dreamed of

Once in a lullaby ii ii iii

Somewhere over the rainbow

Blue birds fly

And the dreams that you dreamed of

Dreams really do come true ooh ooooh

Someday I'll wish upon a star

Wake up where the clouds are far behind me ee ee eeh

Where trouble melts like lemon drops

High above the chimney tops that's where you'll find me oh

Somewhere over the rainbow bluebirds fly

And the dream that you dare to,Oh why, oh why can't I?

Well I see trees of green and

Red roses too,

I'll watch them bloom for me and you

And I think to myself

What a wonderful world

Well I see skies of blue and I see clouds of white

And the brightness of day

I like the dark and I think to myself

What a wonderful world

The colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky

Are also on the faces of people passing by

I see friends shaking hands

Saying, "How do you do?"

They're really saying, I...I love you

I hear babies cry and I watch them grow,

They'll learn much more

Than we'll know

And I think to myself

What a wonderful world world

Someday I'll wish upon a star,

Wake up where the clouds are far behind me

Where trouble melts like lemon drops

High above the chimney top that's where you'll find me

Oh, Somewhere over the rainbow way up high

And the dream that you dare to, why, oh why can't I? I?

An Anthology of Looking: Stephan Moccio - Life

I prefer to be able to sing a song, hence instrumentals have never been my favorite. OK, there are times when you want to just lie back and enjoy or feel the song, but I never been good at just 'enjoying' or 'feeling' a song: I want to be able to 'think about' the song. Hence mere instruments falter me. 

Stephan Moccio, an artist I came to know by chance, is able to make me think about his songs though. A pianist, composer, producer, arranger, conductor and recording artist, he has worked with the likes of Celine Dion, Sarah Brightman, Chantal Kreviazuk, Hayley Westenra, Olivia Newton-John, Seal, Randy Jackson, Joshua Payne, Mario Frangoulis, The Canadian Tenors, and RyanDan. 

Each of his three albums has 20+ tracks (!): almost half are less than 2.5 minutes in duration, a huge percentage of which are less than 1.5 minute. Perfect intermezzos without getting me bored! Just like the breeze: sometimes a quick, gentle breeze is all you need to revive yourself rather than a continuous wind that could leave you gasping for air. If you know what I mean :). 

His tracks with longer duration are a feast to the ears though, and to me a nourishment to the soul. One particular song that I'm very fond of, one that gets me to 'think' of is titled Life - it appears on Stephan's 2nd album Colors (2006), and re-appears on the newest Elements (2012). Everytime I hear the song, I don't just think about the song, but I am able to feel it, enjoy it. I meditate on the song, I can  drown myself in it. It's a song that literally can blow me away. 

http://stephanmoccio.com/music/

An Anthology of Looking: Switchfoot - Restless

I have always have a thing for Switchfoot ever since they went prominently 'public' in 2002, thanks to the movie A Walk to Remember. My sister Marcia brought the OST cassette, and I think we've played it over and over over like a gazillion times. (I wonder if she still has it?). I brought their A Beautiful Letdown cassette (hey, CDs WAS expensive back then, and still is!) -for no reason I can remember, I brought two-, and have then been downloading their albums freely ;p. 

The highlight of my fan-fare so far I think IS when I went to Bali last August 2012 with my bestie @fennyp to see the guys \^o^/. They are just beyond AHSOME!

Their latest album Vice Verses is really a masterpiece - IT IS!

Well, enough said. Here goes Restless, one of the amazing pieces in Vice Verses.

Written by Jon Foreman
From the album "Vice Verses (2011)" 

I am the sea on a moonless night
Calling falling, slipping tides
I am the leaky, dripping pipes
The endless, aching drops of light

I am the raindrop falling down
Always longing for the deeper ground
I am the broken, breaking seas
Even my blood finds ways to bleed

Even the rivers ways to run 
Even the rain to reach the sun
Even my thirsty streams 
Even in my dreams

I am restless, I am restless, I am restless
Looking for you
I am restless
I run like the ocean to find your shore
Looking for you

I am the thorn stuck in your side
I am the one that you left behind
I am the dried-up doubting eyes
Looking for the well that won't run dry

Running hard for the other side
The world that I've always been denied
Running hard for the infinite
With the tears of saints and hypocrites

Oh, blood of black and white and grey
Oh, death in life and night in day
One by one by one
We let our rivers run

I can hear you breathing
I can feel you leading
More than just a feeling
More than just a feeling

I can feel you you reaching
Pushing through the ceiling
Til the final healing
I'm looking for you

Until the sea of glass we meet
At last completed and complete
Where tide and tear and pain subside
And laughter drinks them dry

I'll be waiting
Anticipating
All that I aim for
What I was made for

With every heartbeat
All of my blood bleeds
Running inside me
Looking for you 

An Anthology of Looking - Moving On

I just realized that I have not been updating my blog for almost a year. The silly thing is: I write emails almost everyday -that is my job by the way-, but never really find the time make the time to also do some writing on my blog.

Well, this is the last day of Movember, so I think: what the hhhh, let's just write again ok!

It seems also providential that this past week I have been on a whirlwind. There were new scars to mend; although I don't think I would be fully healed, and there were also big decisions to make. Although in the end it seems that no decision was made -because I'm still here, that is- I made one of the most difficult decisions in my life so far: which is to make peace with the things that I cannot seem to change at this point, including staying over in Manado. 

It's a dreadful feeling: I always be the one who control my decisions and jump up to new turnings in a heartbeat with only ME in mind, but hey, lookie there Gracie: you have other people to think about. 

So I stay. It took me a week to pick up myself again, to realize that sometimes you don't have to literally move over to move on. 

Good music and good readings and the sky and my sisters helped me through it all. So for the rest of 2012, I would be posting things that helped me through it all. In an instant I want to call this An Anthology of Looking: because I seem to be static, but I always, and would always, looking out for something more.